In the life of every married couple sooner or later, a period begins when relations begin to crumble like a card house. The crisis of family life can occur at any time, but modern sociologists identify several of the most difficult periods in the life of the family.
Crises of family life accompany the turning point stages of family development. That is why many married couples are faced with the same problems on a certain segment of family life. According to sociological research, most of the divorces fall on the first, third, fifth, seventh and fourteenth anniversary of the wedding.
The first year is a crisis of mutual grinding
Когда двое взрослых людей начинают жить под одной крышей, неизбежно происходит притирка темпераментов, характеров, вкусов и привычек. The cause of conflicts can be a different lifestyle, for example, one of the partners prefers outdoor activities, and the other likes to lie down on the couch and watch TV. Disagreements between spouses can occur due to cleaning the apartment, food, planning the family budget, joint pastime, etc. D. If the husband and wife love each other for real, then the first crises are easily experienced.
Three years – the crisis of the first -born
As a rule, at this time a child appears in the family, and a woman leaves her head to motherhood, devoting all her time to care for the baby. The husband, in turn, begins to experience a deficit of female attention and jealen the spouse to the first -born. A sexually unsatisfied young father notices more and more disadvantages in his wife, and tries to make up for a lack of female affection on the side. A woman is tormented by suspicions and arranges scandals, thereby only aggravating the situation. Such crises do not arise if a woman pays her husband enough attention.
Five years – a return crisis
The crises of family life observed after five years of life together most often provoke women. Returning to active social life after maternity leave, the woman begins to understand that much does not have time. After all, she needs to work, look good, keep comfort in the house, raise a child and pay attention to her husband. In addition, after forced reclusion, a woman begins to experience an acute need for fresh impressions, which often leads her to the arms of another man. In this difficult period, the husband should pay more attention to the spouse, and then a lot can be corrected.
Seven years – a crisis of monotony
When everything has already been established in the family: communication, intimate relationships, life, work, the time of the fourth crisis comes. At this stage, crises of family life are considered a consequence of boredom and monotony. Now both halves are inclined to start novels on the side, but if women expect fresh emotions and “storm of passions” from the new relationship, then men want to feel like “hunters” again. But only unlike their wives, men are in no hurry to ruin the family and the established lifestyle, for the sake of the new passion. At this stage, the mutual struggle with the monotony and monotony of everyday life will help to overcome the crises of family life.
Fourteen years – middle -aged crisis
Closer to 40 years, family relations are subjected to the most important inspection for strength. Even the most loving couples are faced with sexual and emotional stagnation. In women, the period of menopause is approached, which is characterized by sharp mood swings and irritability. Beauty begins to gradually fade, and a woman painfully experiences changes in her appearance. Men begin to realize that old age awaits them ahead, and nothing new will happen. Such thoughts lead representatives of the strong half of humanity to hidden neurosis. Many men are trying to create the illusion of youth, entering into a new marriage with younger women. However, with joint efforts and mutual desire, couples with honor withstand such crises.
Anti -crisis memo
Successful overcoming the crisis is the key to the successful development of the family in the future. So that such crises of family life do not become a serious test for relations, it is necessary to be guided by simple rules:
1. Do not be silent. It is necessary to talk with a partner, expressing your desires, anxiety and claims. You need to do this in a tactful form, excluding insults and rude words.
2. Compromise. You need to learn how to give in to a loved one. Family life should not turn into a continuous competition.
3. Be a reasonable egoist. Do not get hung up on the life of your partner or children. Developing as a person, the bang becomes interesting not only to himself, but also to his second half.
4. Forgive and ask for forgiveness. In order to overcome the crises of family life with the dignity of the crises of family life, it is necessary to learn not only to ask for forgiveness, but also to forgive the mistakes of your partner.